The Key To Having Kids is Having Friends Who are AWOKS (Adults Without Kids)

I've just come back from a weekend at Hidden Valley Ski resort in Sommerset, PA. Our good friend J. found an amazing vacation rental: cathedral ceilings, gorgeous bedrooms, a well appointed kitchen, a spacious living room, and gorgeous views of snowy woods. In attendance were two married couples with no kids (J and M, and V and A), bachelor D.B., D and E with their kids, A and C, and me, Josh, Jacob and Casey. I was a little worried before the trip, because I can only imagine that if you are a person without children, and you are on vacation, that you do not want to get up at 5/6/7 AM in the morning. In fact, speaking as a person with children on most vacation days I do not enjoy getting up at 5/6/7 in the morning.

But I must praise my friends without kids for not only putting up with my kids and their terrible early rising habits, but, also, for playing board games with them, playing air hockey with them, playing "monkey in the middle" with them, tickling them, listening to them, laughing at their jokes, pushing them around the living room and pretending they were snow plows, taking pictures of them, sledding with them, and being all around awesome with them. The time you spent with my children gave me time to relax, hang out, read the newspaper, drink coffee, cook, clean, hike, admire my children from a short distance, and catch my breath.

Two days before the snow weekend my good friend Andy B. crashed at our place for two nights while he networked with his colleagues at CMU. He was a major celebrity guest for Jacob and Casey; they worked intently on a WELCOME ANDY banner, and Andy was kind enough to bring a really cool present for the kids---a set of "tell me a story" story telling cards. Andy has kids of his own, but on this trip they weren't with him. And so Andy was able to play with Jacob and Casey in such a way that they felt like the coolest kids in the world.

This weekend got me to thinking: isn't 3 to 1 a pretty good adult-to-child ratio? Shouldn't we be in these sorts of communal arrangements more often? It wasn't just that having adults without kids (AWOKs) around made my life easier (which they did) but they also helped me to see my kids a new way. I realized how much my kids JUST WANT TO PLAY, and how much it means to them to be taken seriously and listened to by adults.

During the communal weekend I also enjoyed squeezing and holding baby C-lion and Monx, and getting to support mom-of-newborn E in the way that I so wanted to be supported when I had a newborn. The weekend was over too quickly. I'm grateful to my new extended network of AWOKs, and I look forward to our next gathering!