Going Overboard on Birthdays: Guilty as Charged

If you know me you have heard me complain about the modern child's birthday party. I am often overwhelmed by what I call the "potlatch" birthday, in which all the kids in a class are invited, plus all siblings and parents. Often these are held at a large indoor venue, like a play space, or a shopping mall bounce house arena. While I always enjoy attending these birthday parties---nothing like taking my kids to a giant bouncer on a rainy Saturday afternoon and chowing down on cake and pizza, it often seems to be that the birthday child gets a bit overshadowed in the mayhem. Of course I have hosted a potlatch birthday (for Jacob's 4th birthday, in Nashville), and I know where the impetus comes from; it comes from not wanting to exclude anyone---and from no wanting to have one's child navigate the complicated terrain of hurt feelings around inviting, not-inviting, etc. It also comes from just wanting to go all out. It can be cool to host a party like this!

But as much as I am a critic of how birthdays get celebrated, it appears that I am also a perpetrator of overdoing it. For Casey's birthday this year we started with a celebration on the day itself that involved birthday waffles, opening birthday presents, and about 2 hours of self-imposed purgatory a Chuck E. Cheese.







But Josh couldn't be there a Chuck E. Cheese, so the day after Casey's birthday we participated in the Cyert tradition of the "birthday walk." This is a cool tradition. Casey chooses a "birthday committee." Those kids find out the destination of her walk, and then make a map of the walk, with stops that might be important to the Birthday child. Then the whole class goes on the walk, with the child's parents usually in tow.



Josh's office is a very walkable distance from Cyert center, so Casey's birthday committee charted a path to and from Josh's office. Jacob was off for spring break, so he came along with us.



We left about 10:00 AM and walked down a very busy Fifth avenue, past the Mr. Rogers dinosaur, and to Josh's office in Webster Hall. I brought some cookies that I remembered having as a kid; they are a "no bake" cookie made of oatmeal, butter, milk, cocoa, peanut butter, etc., whipped up on the stove top, because our bake element burned out last month (a long term consequence of what I am now calling the Curse of the Meatloaf Mummy, which you can read about here).

The walk was cold and windy, but the kids spirits were high, and it was adorable to see about 20 kids file into Josh's conference room.



There I read a book called A Flock of Shoes, which is about what happens to your favorite seasonal shoes when you are not wearing them (apparently they fly about and take trains and send you postcards). The kids loved the cookies and the story, and then we headed back to Cyert.



On SATURDAY we had Casey's official birthday party, which was a princess themed party. I'm actually the one who pushed the princess theme because I found this adorable doll castle made of cardboard that I thought would make a great party centerpiece. The 4 girls who were coming to the party NOT ONLY had princess garb to wear to the princess party; many of them had MORE THAN ONE princess dress to choose from. The girls looked adorable.



We also had an Easter egg hunt with plastic eggs decorated with princess themed images (from Oriental Trading) and a cake from Josh's favorite french bakery in Millvale.





The party went off pretty well, though there was some in-fighting amongst the princesses over wands and eggs filled with candy.





Casey acted a bit spoiled and bossy, which is understandable, but perhaps also the result of this being the third or fourth celebration of her birthday in just under a week.

THEN after the party was over Josh took Casey shopping for her birthday wish, which was a pair of Sketcher tennis shoes. She also picked out some clothes which are beyond cute.






At the end of it all we were all pretty tired. And especially Casey. I don't know what to make of this week of over-celebration; it was brought on, in part, by the fact that I had the week off from work, so I had extra energy to devote to the party. But I guess I have to admit that I am part and parcel of my demographic. I am just as prone to spending too much money and energy on a child's party....with the great likelihood of this being a party that Casey won't even remember!

I think this over celebrating comes from a genuine desire to celebrate our children, and to show our love and admiration. But am I also trying to show off? I'm not sure. What do you remember about celebrating your birthday as a child?