Taking it on the Chin

It was a dark, cold and rainy day, but still. It didn’t seem like the kind of day that was going to end with a trip to the hospital. We started the morning with a drive to the best French patisserie in Pittsburgh, Jean-Marc’s. Casey had an orange pumpkin cookie and Josh and Jacob had maple bars. I had one small bite of Josh’s pastry, and then I tried to fill up on the aroma of freshly baked sweets.

In Aspinwall, a few miles from the bakery, we dropped off our broken printer at a UPS store and got some coffee. Then we headed over to the Children’s Museum, where the kids amused themselves in the Mr. Roger’s entry-way for almost an hour! Josh and I sat on the couch and drank our coffee. The place was mobbed with big families, including grandparents, and lots of pregnant women.

We drove home and the kids had “Chicken Mac n Cheese” for lunch. I’m pretty proud of this dish, since I make it lot but don’t actually eat chicken myself. Everyone else seems to like it. Casey woke up first, and then Jacob. We fed the kids an early afternoon dinner, and then bundled up for a short walk to the bowling alley near our house, called Forward Lanes.

At the bowling alley there were plenty of close calls. The 11 year old girl in the lane next to us accidentally pushed a bowling ball off the rack, missing Casey by about an inch. Jacob and Casey both threw the bowling ball towards the pins like they were heaving a shot put in the Olympics. A few times I pictured each of them in the ER with broken toes. We had “bumpers” on our lanes, so Casey, with her slow rolling balls, actually came in third for the family, behind Josh (#1) and me (#2). Jacob loves to bowl, and was sad to leave.

On our way home we stopped at Starbucks to get our Costco Starbucks coffee ground. The kids got to split a cookie, and Josh got a donut. I enjoyed thinking about the 22 pounds I’ve lost since August (yes, you read that right. 22 POUNDS. And counting). We climbed the small hill between Starbucks and our house, hustling the kids up and down the wet streets. It was about 6:30 PM, and already dark, when we started to climb the 30 or so steps in front of our house.

On the way up the steps Jacob stuffed his hands in his coat pockets and was skip-hopping up each step. He tried to cut in front of Josh, and I called out to him. “Don’t get in front of your dad, Jacob.” I turned my eyes away from him, for a minute, but then I heard a thud in front of me. Jacob had fallen, and he was starting to wail. Josh picked him up and gave him a big bear hug. Then we both noticed that blood was gushing from his chin.

We snapped on the light in the entryway at the bottom of the stairs to our apartment. Jacob had a gash on his chin that was so deep it looked like an animal had taken a bite out of it. Josh knew exactly what was in store for Jacob that evening. “He’s going to need stitches.”

This probably wasn’t the right thing to say to Jacob at this particular moment, because it only increased the volume on Jacob’s howling. Josh got Jacob to hold a clean rag to hold on his chin, and we ushered Jacob upstairs. Josh cleaned the wound as best he could, and put a bandage on it. I agreed to take Jacob to the ER. I put some books, snacks, games and some college papers to grade in my purse, and we headed out for the newly remodeled Children’s Hospital, on the other side of town where we used to live.

The waiting room at the new Children’s Hospital was like something out of the future. There were more than 100 people in the waiting area. It was cavernous, with high ceilings and brightly colored walls; one grape colored, one lemon-lime, one cantaloupe. There were six giant seating areas, each with it’s own large, flat screen TV, tuned to the Cartoon Network. There were a few consoles scattered around the room that seemed like they had games on them. Half of the families were wearing masks, and the sound of raspy, hacking coughing filled the air. After we sat down I heard several of the parents talking about how many times they had been to the ER with their children, just this week.

We were there for almost an hour before someone called our name. I thought we were just going to be registered, but instead we were ushered into a clean, well-lit examining room that boasted another brand new TV. I guess flesh wounds have their advantages in the waiting room hierarchy. A doctor in his early 20s (or was he 19?), with long hair, looked at Jacob’s chin and said it would definitely need stitches. He asked one of the nurses to put a numbing jelly on Jacob’s chin. When the nurse saw the size of Jacob’s gash she put on an extra dose.

Jacob stretched out on the hospital bed and watched Teen Titans on the Cartoon Network. I patted him and graded papers. Every once and awhile I would see the long-haired doctor pass our room, and I would try to catch his eye and look plaintive, but not pathetic, in the hopes that maybe he would choose us next. After another thirty minutes or so a woman with a stethoscope hanging around her neck came in and said that she was the doctor. She examined Jacob and told him how strong he was. She said, “someone’s going to come in and put some numbing jelly on your chin.” I said, “We got that about 30 minutes ago.” “Oh,” she said, looking surprised. “I guess they take pretty good care of me here.”

The doctor disappeared mysteriously for another 20 minutes, and then came back holding an armful of supplies. She washed Jacob’s wound with water, and then iodine. She asked me if I could hold Jacob’s head really still. “I think I can hold his head,” I ventured. “Would you like someone to come and help hold his head?” she asked, meaningfully. I pictured the doctor sewing up Jacob’s chin, and me passed out on the floor. “Let’s get someone to help hold Jacob’s head,” I agreed.

A nurse came into hold Jacob head. She was young, and had a Pittsburgh accent, and she told the story of how when she was little she had tossed a bowling ball up in the air and tried to catch it. She broke her finger and ended up in the ER! She asked Jacob about his kindergarten class and about his planned costume for Halloween. I tried to watch the stitching for a minute, and then sat down because I was starting to feel sick. The doctor put in 5 individual stitches, tying each one as she went, and then put a dozen millimeter wide strips of tape across Jacob’s chin. The doctor and the nurse told Jacob he was the best patient they had had all day. They said he was “super tough.” Jacob replied, “I’m even tougher than my dad!”

Jacob snacked on a protein bar on the way home from the hospital. He was quiet, and he seemed happy. I thought about how grateful I was that we had such good health insurance; even so, the ER co-pay was $50.00. I promised Jacob a few pieces of Halloween candy when we got home; by this time it was about 9:40 PM. Josh was watching the Alabama/South Carolina game, which Alabama was winning. We gave Jacob lots of love and put him to bed. I had a headache, so I took some ibuprofen. Josh came into our bedroom and rubbed my back until I fell asleep.

There was no doubt about it: Jacob had taken it on the chin. Josh and I talked to him about the importance of keeping his hands out of his pockets when he was running, and especially running up a wet staircase. But thanks to some good doctors and our good fortune, Jacob’s accident didn’t ruin our great day.